Also, it’s ok that she has a relationship, it’s ok that she wants her cousin in it, it’s not ok that she wants you to pay (half) for her wedding so a person that truly hurt you can participate in it as well." —u/AsuraRathalos “My sister and ex-fiancee got married and I said they were both dead to me. Any place they are, I won’t go. I don’t expect my family to cut her off (since she’s the golden child), but I have cut people off that didn’t respect my boundaries and tried to force reconciliation. I wouldn’t pay either.” —u/icantweightandsee “The people around you need a reality check. Ask your daughter if her fiancé cheated on her tomorrow, moved on with the affair partner, and you decided to stay close to him, if she’d be okay with it. It’s so easy for everyone to judge you when they’re not in your shoes. And in terms of the money, tradition or not, it’s yours and you can do with it as you please.” —u/Caribe92

—u/Arilyne “I mean, the mind boggles as to why she would gravitate to her uncle, build a relationship in secret, and then tell her dad all this and expect him to pat her on the head and pay for her wedding. The brother, who’s basically showing he still doesn’t care about his sibling, can pay [for the wedding]. It’s like the brother is making the point again about how he can get what he wants and have a relationship with whomever he wants, except he comes out stinking of roses because he’s not the one refusing to pay for his daughter’s wedding. OP, you’re prob best off without them all, TBH.” —u/me_version_2 —u/Kaiser93

“It’s been 26 years, longer than OP’s daughter has even been alive. I understand being annoyed that his brother is invited, not wanting to talk to him, or take pictures with him, etc. But giving up your relationship with your daughter is like cutting off your nose to spite your face. Here’s my question, OP: Your brother stole your girlfriend. Do you want him to steal your daughter, too? Your grandchildren? If not, suck it up for a day.” —u/JoeCoT